Is There Love After Cheating?

 

5 Tips To Move Forward In A Relationship After Cheating

Written By: Rose Joseph (J.J.)

When we fall in love, there is nothing quite like it. When the person we love loves us back, we feel like we have it all. However, hearing "I cheated on you" or "I cheated on my girlfriend/boyfriend" from the person we love can change a relationship fast and make us feel hopeless. Some individuals consider infidelity a deal breaker and believe "Once a cheater always a cheater." However, studies have shown that it is possible to have a happy relationship with someone after cheating, and many relationships have worked through infidelity. "Some individuals have cheated in the past but never cheat again, vice versa."

Are you wondering how to repair your relationship after infidelity? Whether you believe "Once A Cheater Always A Cheater" or not, it's your right to feel that way. Personally, I consider cheating a deal breaker, but I respect that everyone may not share the same viewpoint. If you're seeking ways to work on your relationship post-cheating, keep reading for some helpful tips to move forward. 

Moving Forward

1. When working on a relationship after cheating, both the person who cheated and the other person need to take accountability and acknowledge the impact it had on the relationship. Cheating doesn't just affect the person who cheated; it affects both partners. You can start by asking yourself a few questions:

• - Do you regret it?
• - Do you feel ready to be held accountable for your actions?
• - Do you think you should be held accountable?
• - Are you ready to put the time in to fix your relationship?
• - How did it affect your partner?

Answering these questions can help you acknowledge the impact cheating had and will have on your relationship. Lastly, ask yourself if you see yourself doing this again.

2. Understand your partner's feelings and know that it took a toll on their emotions, as well as yours; Your partner's feelings will likely be all over the place. They may feel resentment, anxiety, depression, betrayal, hurt, and confusion, and these feelings are all valid and expected. As the one who cheated, you will likely experience intense feelings of guilt, shame, and remorse. It's important to work through these feelings together and understand that even though it may feel like things will never get better, they will. If you or your partner finds yourself stuck and can't seem to get past these feelings, or if they are too hard you can always seek professional help by going to "Couples counseling or Relationship therapy."

3. Think about why - Identify the reason behind why you cheated in the first place; To work on your relationship and prevent future infidelity, it's important to understand why you cheated. Whether it was a meaningless one-night stand due to drinking or had a deeper meaning, it doesn't make you a terrible person. Many people have faced similar situations. Start by asking yourself some questions:

• - Was it due to low self-esteem
• - changes in sexual desires,
• - boredom
• - long-distance,
• - lack of intimacy,
• - or growing apart?

Answering honestly can help you identify the reasons behind your actions. However, don't play the blame game, and blame your partner for your actions. Be honest and talk about it with them.

4. Rebuild Trust and have open communications; This is an important part of rebuilding a relationship after cheating. You need to be open and honest with your partner. If you feel there is a lack of intimacy, sense that you're growing apart, or notice that the relationship is becoming dull, you need to communicate these concerns to your partner. While it may be difficult, being honest is better than keeping them in the dark, as that could potentially lead to another instance of cheating. It's important to let your partner know so that you can work together to prevent it from happening again. When it comes to trust, don't expect your partner to trust you right away. You will need to work on rebuilding that trust and show them that you made a mistake and are committed to not repeating it. Give them the time they need, and avoid getting angry if they need time - after all, you are the one who cheated.

5. Self-care is part of moving forward; It's common to develop negative behavior and feel hopeless after infidelity in a relationship. It can include poor sleeping habits and more. It's important to take care of yourself despite the guilt of hurting your loved one. Remember, there is still hope for both of you.

It's important to remember that there are many ways to move forward after someone cheats in a relationship. There are steps you can take that could benefit both of you, such as spending time with your family and friends. However, it's not advisable to ask for or take advice from them. This is because family and friends tend to take sides, and involving them in the details of your relationship can make things worse. But, it's crucial to mention that this doesn't mean you shouldn't tell them if you are being abused. It's always important to speak out in that situation.

You can also:

Set Boundaries: Having boundaries in place for both you and your partner will help you cope and move forward. Once these boundaries are set, do not backtrack or disregard them.

Learn from experience; We all learn from our mistakes. We may not want to have made this mistake in life, but now that you have, learn from it. By examining the situation, you can use this as a learning experience for you and your partner's future.